yesterday i determined to get in some good study time. i carved it out and spent a wonderful couple hours in the Word of God. the boys were good (minus a couple squabbles) and the house was reasonably quiet. i got done feeling refreshed and so excited at having time with my Father and even a little time to share with you here.
and then the assault hit. it caught me totally off guard. Isaac decided to have a one sided fist fight with his brother for no apparent reason. i calmly asked Isaac to come upstairs and a furious meltdown dissolved my little man resulting in 45 minutes of handing out judgement and helping him learn to get control of his emotions and talking through his decision to sin and the consequences of choosing sin over righteousness. (have i ever mentioned that biblical parenting is very time consuming????) that put me very behind on making treats for Bible study & Christian felt that he was completely neglected and so spent the next hour crying, begging to be held and screaming at his brother while i tried to pull together supper. the rain prevented grilling our meal like i had planned and because my oven was preoccupied with affore mentioned treats, supper was late. thus, no shower for mommy (sigh...). after changing into clean pants (that were way to big 6 months ago) and pulling my greasy hair into a pony tail, we headed out into the rain for Bible study.
it might not get to some people. i know that not everyone would feel bad serving supper late or being reminded that they have gained weight. and on another day, it probably wouldn't have bothered me either. but yesterday, after such an amazing high, i was emotionally crushed. how could i have spent so much time eating up the words of my Lord and end the day feeling so defeated?
as we sat in the kitchen, my loving husband reminded me that when we seek to live an active christian life, that is when we are so viciously attacked.
once we reached Bible study, Kyle shared Ephesians 6:10-17 with us...
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.
Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand first.
Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,
and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
And take the helmet of salvation, and the sward of the Spirit, which is the word of God."
notice a theme? STAND FIRM. the devil will attack and he is not alone and he is strong. do not take lightly the task of standing firm.
God has given me so many tools to use for this defensive position. the armor of God is everything i need in order to maintain a strong place, here where my Father has put me.
yet, i neglected to prepare for the attack yesterday and was overtaken.
today, in order to have time in the Word, i traded sleep and woke at 6:40 with Nicholas. my brain was tired, but it was still wonderful to have some quiet time before the business of the day set in. and today, i was more prepared for attack. not completely prepared, but more than yesterday. Lord willing, tomorrow i will be more prepared than today.