i'm not sure how to put all of my thoughts into order on this, but i will try. (to the single ladies, this post will talk a lot about parenting, but can be applied to all relationships.)
God has been convicting of how i react to my sons. i know that 3 year olds and 1 year olds can be a handful and are still learning what is good, though they seem to know all the bad already. as a parent, i have been commanded by God to train up my children (Proverbs_22:6) and there will great blessing and joy from teaching him God's ways (Proverbs_23:15-16).
God blessed me with this verse that is actually written to the young pastor Timothy in reguard to his church. However, i do think that it can also be applied to parenting.
2 Timothy 4:2
"preach the Word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience and instruction."
(note: instruction should be godly, so, use the Word of God)
Great words to take to heart and apply within our homes. read it again and absorb the multitude of instruction in that verse. isn't it fantastic and yet terrifying at the same time? Yet, we have no need to get ourselves in a tizzy. Our great and awesome God supplies not only the command, but also the strength and Spirit to help us obey it.
But what about when i fail to obey? especially in the patience part? Because you fail that one and pretty quickly all the others will go flying out the window. i mean, i've never heard a parent screaming scripture at their children. yeah, just doesn't fit together.
So when i have no patience, what do i have?
well first of all, i am practicing this...
"Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which i forewarn you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God."
firstly, a clarification for all who might be confused. these verses are not saying that people who do bad go to hell and people who do good go to heaven. we know that our God does not save on the basis of works (Eph_2:8-9) because everyone deserves an eternal stay in hell (Romans_6:23) were it not for the death of the Messiah, Jesus Christ, God's Son, who paid our penalty on the cross and demonstrated his victory over sin by rising from the dead. As a result, all are offered salvation by simply repenting from their sin and turning their life over to the true God of all (Romans_10:9-11).
that being said, Galatians 5 does contrast what the life of an unbeliever looks like and the life of a true believer (Gal_5:22-25). so if strife and outbursts of anger are characteristic of an unsaved person, why am i partaking in them? and why do i make excuses for doing them? don't sit there like you don't. we all make excuses for losing patience.
-i'm tired. they kept me up late/woke me up early today!
-i don't feel well. this headache is killing me!
-they have been so naughty today, this is just the straw that broke the camels back!
-the day has been crazy! i've had so much to do and nothing is going like i planned.
just like when we were first saved, we have to admit our sin and take it to God.
so just like i asked before, when i don't have patience, what do i have?
i have anger
Proverbs 19:19, 16:32, 17:27, 19:11
i have selfishness/pride
Proverbs 18:1, 16:18, 18:12, Phil 2:3,
all wrapped up in those i found that i personally also have self pity due to my bad day, lack of joy in my heart and in my house, envy of single individuals or newly weds, discontentment with my stage of life, the list goes on and on as sinful actions snow ball.
let me leave you with a quote & a verse...
"Righteous indignation leads to right actions. Unrighteous indignation leads to unright actions." - Andy Thompson
When blatant sin makes you upset, it will lead you to remove that sin from your life, motivate you to share the gospel with the one sinning, or drive you away from a possibly compromising situation. that is right action from righteous anger.
When your anger is not godly (note: i didn't use the word justified because we misuse that word) it will lead to actions that are not godly (refer back to Galatians 5 if need be).
1 John 3:18
"Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth."
as always, answer honestly...
have you really repented from your sin and turned your life over to Christ, making you a child of God?
if you answered yes, are you acting like it??
how can you remind yourself to be more patient with others?
how can you cool down a situation that you are quickly loosing patience with?